Creating boundaries. Penn Badgley , Neal McDonough and more stars have candidly discussed their decisions not to film sex scenes in future projects. When season 4 of You premiered in February 2023, the Gossip Girl alum broke down how his marriage to Domino Kirke shifted his time filming the Netflix series.
“I asked [the creator of the show] Sera Gamble , ‘Can I just do no more intimacy scenes?'” Badgley revealed during an episode of his “Podcrushed” podcast. “This is actually a decision I’d made before I took the show.” He continued: “I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned it publicly, but one of the main things was, like, do I want to put myself back on a career path where I’m just always the romantic lead.
Fidelity in every relationship, and especially my marriage, is really important to me.” At the time, the actor explained that he thought about cutting back on intimacy scenes as soon as he accepted the role of Joe Goldberg. (You debuted in 2018.
) “It just got to a point where I don’t want to do that. Before I took the show, it was a question, ‘Do I have a career if I don’t?’ Think about every male lead you’ve loved. Are they kissing someone? Are they doing a lot more than that?” Badgley, who welcomed a son with his wife in September 2020 , continued.
“I said to Sera, ‘My desire would be zero, to go from 100 to zero.’ But I signed this contract, I signed up for this show, I know what I did. You can’t take this aspect out of the DNA of the concept, so ‘How much less can you make it?’ was my question for them.
” The Easy A actor credited You ‘s showrunner for allowing him the freedom to veto future sex scenes , saying, “She didn’t even bat an eye. She was really glad that I was that honest, and she had a really positive response. She appreciated my directness, and she appreciated that I was being reasonable and practical.
And they came back with a phenomenal reduction.” Meanwhile, McDonough claimed his stance on not kissing costars cost him a role on ABC’s Scoundrels . “I was [surprised], and it was a horrible situation for me,” the 100 alum recalled to Closer in 2019 about his decision not to film steamy scenes with Virginia Madsen .
“After that, I couldn’t get a job because everybody thought I was this religious zealot. I am very religious. I put God and family first, and me second.
That’s what I live by. It was hard for a few years. But I was not going to lose the fight.
And it worked. My career has been phenomenal.” You have successfully subscribed.
By signing up, I agree to the Terms and Privacy Policy and to receive emails from Us Weekly Check our latest news in Google News Check our latest news in Apple News The Massachusetts native, who is a devout Catholic, also praised the way Desperate Housewives accommodated his request. (McDonough played Nicollette Sheridan ’s husband on the hit drama from 2008 to 2009.) “When [creator] Marc Cherry signed me, I said, ‘I’m sure you know, but I won’t kiss anybody,’” the Yellowstone star, who has been married to modal Ruvé Robertson since 2003 , continued.
“He was like, ‘But this is Desperate Housewives !’ I said, ‘I know.’ He paused for about five seconds and said, ‘All right, I’m just going to have to write better.’ And we had a great time.
” Scroll down for other stars who have publicly opted out of filming sex scenes: Credit: Shutterstock (2) Actors Who Addressed Their Decision Not to Kiss Costars, Film Sex Scenes Over the Years: From Penn Badgley to Kirk Cameron Creating boundaries. Penn Badgley , Neal McDonough and more stars have candidly discussed their decisions not to film sex scenes in future projects.When season 4 of You premiered in February 2023, the Gossip Girl alum broke down how his marriage to Domino Kirke shifted his time filming the Netflix series.
“I asked [the creator of the show] Sera Gamble , 'Can I just do no more intimacy scenes?'" Badgley revealed during an episode of his "Podcrushed" podcast. “This is actually a decision I’d made before I took the show."He continued: "I don’t think I’ve ever mentioned it publicly, but one of the main things was, like, do I want to put myself back on a career path where I’m just always the romantic lead.
Fidelity in every relationship, and especially my marriage, is really important to me."At the time, the actor explained that he thought about cutting back on intimacy scenes as soon as he accepted the role of Joe Goldberg. (You debuted in 2018.
)"It just got to a point where I don’t want to do that. Before I took the show, it was a question, 'Do I have a career if I don’t?' Think about every male lead you’ve loved. Are they kissing someone? Are they doing a lot more than that?" Badgley, who welcomed a son with his wife in September 2020 , continued.
“I said to Sera, ‘My desire would be zero, to go from 100 to zero.’ But I signed this contract, I signed up for this show, I know what I did. You can’t take this aspect out of the DNA of the concept, so ‘How much less can you make it?’ was my question for them.
"The Easy A actor credited You 's showrunner for allowing him the freedom to veto future sex scenes , saying, "She didn’t even bat an eye. She was really glad that I was that honest, and she had a really positive response. She appreciated my directness, and she appreciated that I was being reasonable and practical.
And they came back with a phenomenal reduction.”Meanwhile, McDonough claimed his stance on not kissing costars cost him a role on ABC's Scoundrels .“I was [surprised], and it was a horrible situation for me,” the 100 alum recalled to Closer in 2019 about his decision not to film steamy scenes with Virginia Madsen .
“After that, I couldn’t get a job because everybody thought I was this religious zealot. I am very religious. I put God and family first, and me second.
That’s what I live by. It was hard for a few years. But I was not going to lose the fight.
And it worked. My career has been phenomenal.”The Massachusetts native, who is a devout Catholic, also praised the way Desperate Housewives accommodated his request.
(McDonough played Nicollette Sheridan ’s husband on the hit drama from 2008 to 2009.)“When [creator] Marc Cherry signed me, I said, ‘I’m sure you know, but I won’t kiss anybody,’” the Yellowstone star, who has been married to modal Ruvé Robertson since 2003 , continued. “He was like, ‘But this is Desperate Housewives !' I said, ‘I know.
’ He paused for about five seconds and said, ‘All right, I’m just going to have to write better.’ And we had a great time.”Scroll down for other stars who have publicly opted out of filming sex scenes: Credit: MediaPunch/Shutterstock Penn Badgley Badgley exchanged vows with Kirke in 2017 after three years of dating.
After the couple expanded their family with son James, the Maryland native opened up about choosing to cut back on his onscreen intimacy. “It’s not a place where I’ve blurred lines,” he told Variety in February 2023. “There’s almost nothing I could say with more consecration.
That aspect of Hollywood has always been very disturbing to me — and that aspect of the job, that mercurial boundary — has always been something that I actually don’t want to play with at all.” One month later, the Netflix star argued that his comments were “blown out of proportion," telling GQ , “What I was speaking about wasn’t actually the final product. It was sort of, like, the culture inherent to the production of all movies but particularly those scenes.
It’s like, look, we know that Hollywood has had a history of flagrant exploitation and abuse.” Badgley continued: “It was not easy. It was easy because of Sera’s response, and I felt relieved.
But technically speaking, if I thought I’d had the ability to set that boundary earlier, I would have.” Credit: Isopix/Shutterstock Neal McDonough “I won’t kiss any other woman because these lips are meant for one woman,” the Band of Brothers alum, who shares five children with his wife, shared during an interview with Closer in 2019. McDonough previously claimed that he was fired from Scoundrels for his refusal to film sex scenes.
Credit: Kristin Callahan/Ace/Shutterstock Kirk Cameron “I have a commitment not to kiss any other woman,” the Growing Pains alum, who married Chelsea Noble in 1991 , shared on the Today show in 2008. At the time, Cameron revealed that his wife was the body double for his Fireproof costar Erin Bethea . "So when I’m kissing my wife, we’re actually husband and wife honoring marriage behind the scenes.
” Credit: Chelsea Lauren/Shutterstock Jameela Jamil "I don't do sex scenes. In fact, I was supposed to audition for the most recent season of your show," Jamil told Badgley during a May 2023 episode of his "Podcrushed" podcast. "My character was supposed to be quite sexy, and I pulled out of the audition, because I am so shy about anything sexy that I can't.
" The Good Place alum added: "And then you f—king came out and were like, 'Yeah, I'm not doing sex scenes anymore.' And I was like, 'I didn't even know that was a boundary that we could draw.' But then I was like, 'I should have gone and done the f—king show.
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Actors Who Have Addressed Saying 'No' to Sex Scenes

Creating boundaries. Penn Badgley, Neal McDonough and more stars have candidly discussed their decisions not to film sex scenes in future projects. When season 4 of You premiered in February 2023, the Gossip Girl alum broke down how his marriage to Domino Kirke shifted his time filming the Netflix series. “I asked [the creator of [...]