2 weeks Ago By Qatar Tribune
Qatar tribune Lani Rose R Dizon Doha Seven months ago, 34-year-old Julie Ann Inandan gave birth to her third child in Doha, another son who was welcomed by his two brothers. While many women go through pregnancy and childbirth like a breeze, it’s not always a smooth sailing pregnancy for other women across the world. There are others like Julie, who risk their very lives when trying to deliver life.
Julie, a primary school teacher in Qatar is prone to high-risk pregnancies, a medical condition experienced by women who have medical difficulties related to their health or the health of their baby. Globally, about 20 million pregnancies are classified as high-risk. The mother of three boys has previously suffered an ectopic pregnancy in 2015 and a miscarriage in 2016.
Seven years ago, she finally succeeded in delivering her first baby, albeit struggling from a ventricular septal defect (VSD). During her most recent pregnancy, Julie was also diagnosed with gestational diabetes. In an interview with Qatar Tribune, she added, “For my third baby, I was seeing a dietician regularly.
They found out that I was having high blood pressure and high sugar. I was checking my sugar levels everyday. My pregnancies were always considered high-risk; I needed to be more careful.
I stayed away from social media to also protect my mental health. I walked regularly to be physically fit. And even in the area of financial health, my husband and I have been saving for the baby”.
Many women today may still remember having fear of childbirth when they were still little girls. For Julie, she can still remember the first time she went on that operating table to give birth to her firstborn. She said, “I remember while lying on the operating table, my body was really shaking when they were putting the anesthesia.
I was alone at the time, but the doctors were really helpful. My anesthesiologist was the one holding my hand, and another doctor was on my other side and he kept asking ‘are you okay’? I kept on praying, saying Lord, please protect me”. After an hour and a half of childbirth through cesarean section, Julie, who remained awake the whole time for fear of falling asleep and not being able to wake up again, welcomed her youngest son.
However, even in this day and age where technology and innovation abound, there are still countless of women around the globe who, unlike Julie, don’t survive the operating table when delivering their babies. Pregnant women are still dying from complications during pregnancy or after childbirth. In fact, around 300,000 women lose their lives each year due to pregnancy or childbirth-related complications, according to the World Health Organization (WHO).
Sky Gonzales, a Filipino entrepreneur in Qatar, first met Pilar Grace when they worked together while filming the Doha-based independent movie ‘Angel in June’ in 2010. “She was a really simple and jolly person. I saw that she was kind and a family-oriented woman.
There was no boring time with her. We became friends for a year before we became a couple. After a year of dating, we tied the knot in 2012,” said Sky while talking to Qatar Tribune in an interview recently.
A few months into her first pregnancy the following year, Pilar or PG as she was fondly called by family and friends, was diagnosed with an atrial septic defect (ASD), also called ‘a hole in the heart’, which made her pregnancy ‘high-risk’. “The family was really happy that PG conceived with our first child. But we also felt nervous upon learning about her heart condition.
She really risked her life in giving birth to Caleb. Praise God she was able to deliver Caleb successfully, but it wasn’t easy because a few days after childbirth she had difficulty in breathing. She stayed at the hospital for two more weeks to recover,” Sky added.
Today, Caleb is healthy and brimming with youthful energy at the age of 11 years old. He will turn 12 on June 30. But Pilar’s story of bravery and desire to bear and rear children of her own didn’t end there.
The couple conceived their second child in 2015. Sky said, “For two years, we were a simple and happy family. We also had a lot of plans.
And PG has always wanted a daughter. We prayed for another baby. As husband and wife, we agreed to try again, and the Lord blessed us with another child”.
However, this time around, it was just too much for Pilar’s fragile body to bear the challenges and symptoms brought about by her heart condition. She collapsed twice due to difficulty in breathing, until finally, three weeks after discovering she was pregnant, Pilar told her husband that she couldn’t continue the pregnancy anymore. “We went to the doctor for another check-up and he told us that we had to terminate the pregnancy for medical reasons (TFMR).
We were also advised to do tubal ligation. So PG went through two surgical operations. The complications were just quickly growing out of control,” Sky added.
Pilar was admitted at the hospital on October 10, 2015. Five days later, she passed away on October 15, 2015 at the age of 28 years old. “I was with her the whole week at the hospital.
I was with her and I saw her when the doctor was trying to revive her. I saw everything. And I also kept asking them to do it again, to revive her again.
We didn’t realise what was going to happen that evening. We never expected how things turned out. She was a very strong person.
She was also a non-practicing nurse who was aware of the health risks. Her body just really grew weak from the complications,” said Sky. He added, “It was a short time, two years, of us being a family together with Caleb.
She wished for Caleb to someday be a doctor, because she was also from the health profession. We also enjoyed doing film together since we were both in that industry. I remember a lot of the ways she has impacted me.
She was a godly woman who really loved our son. Caleb was only two years old when she passed away. Life was really challenging for both of us when Pilar left us.
But we’re very grateful to her for the love that she gave us”. As a single father in Doha, Sky who has decided from the beginning that he will never be separated from his son, quickly realised that he had no other choice but to be strong. He said, “Caleb didn’t experience the fancy life that a mother could give; like mothers preparing their children’s food with fruits and everything.
The way I prepared his food was very plain with whatever we had at the fridge. If Pilar were still here at that time, I know she would have been more organised in preparing Caleb’s food. When he was young, I had to bring my son to office.
I’d put him in the other room, and when he cries I would go to him to give him milk. I also experienced dropping him to friends’ houses for some time because I needed to do some important work. It was difficult.
Sky added, “I was told that if a mother gets widowed and becomes a single mother, it is easier for her to take care of her child because she has that natural mother’s instinct and caring nature. But if a father was widowed and becomes a single father, it won’t be the same. It’s more difficult for us.
But only because of God’s grace; He gave me the determination, perseverance, and love that we’ll need to take care of Caleb. Caleb had his mother who fought for him, and still has his dad who will continue to fight for him despite the difficulties in life”. Today, Sky continues to live with Caleb in Doha and the two have never been separated from each other.
Sky said they celebrate and remember Pilar’s life to this day. He talks to Caleb about his mom and shows him videos and photos of Pilar. Caleb has also remained connected with his mother’s relatives in Doha, and the two are planning to visit Pilar’s grave in the Philippines soon.
Copy 22/04/2025 10.
