2 weeks Ago By Heather Saul
Sometimes you fall into unexpected roles in life, and I’ve realised recently that against all odds, I am The Organiser. If an activity or outing is suggested, either for my friends and me, or my son’s friends and him, I’ve accidentally become the person who will check ticket availability, and then, seeing as I’m on the site anyway, offer to book for everyone. Honestly, it’s no trouble! And then we’re guaranteed to be sitting together easily and uncomplicatedly, rather than embarking on a game of nerves, frantically messaging “ROW D, SEATS 3, 4 AND 5” to the WhatsApp group before the booking times out.
I’m not sure being The Organiser technically counts as a good deed, but it’s certainly not going unpunished. Turns out the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and all your friends owing you £14. It’s always an odd, measly little amount like £14, one that you feel really mean and awkward asking for.
But obviously all those £14s add up, and are you really supposed to let them go?Also – yes I’m going to say it, but this is the one and only time it’s been true – it’s not the money, it’s the principle of the thing. Isn’t it? Is it? What is the etiquette of debt collecting from your friends when the sum outstanding is embarrassingly small?if(window.adverts) { window.
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Now and then, as a bonus, they will also write “paid!” on the message thread, which may hopefully shame, sorry I mean, spur everyone else on to follow suit. If it doesn’t, there’s no more they can do to assist you on this journey. You’re on your own now, and the terrain ahead is treacherous and mortifying.
The awful thing is that in my bitter experience, it’s usually the people you like the most who are the worst at settling up. And if you like them the most, of course you want them to like you back, so why risk ruining a beautiful friendship for £14? You should probably leave it, and secretly seethe with resentment behind their back until the day you die instead. It’s much better for an enduring relationship.
If you do decide to be brave and bring it up, I can confirm that there is no way of mentioning it without feeling like the pettiest human to have ever walked the earth. More miserly than those people who split the bill line by line according to who had what, rather than just dividing equally by the number of diners. In this scenario, you have two choices: you can be jokey or pass agg.
Spoiler: both are excruciating. If you take the first option, the insignificant amount becomes the basis of the gag, if you can call it that, which you definitely can’t. You might say something about retiring off it, not needing to bother with the lottery now, using it to emigrate to Rio, ho ho ho.
Yes, I have used all these lines.if(window.adverts) { window.
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adverts.addToArray({"pos": "mpu_tablet_l1"}); }Somehow this buttock-clenchy approach is the least worst though, because going the pass agg route is the last resort. Just checking you have my correct bank details? Just – you must always start with “just” – making sure I haven’t missed that money from you, because I can’t see it in my account but that’s probably because I’m so stupid and bad at maths and a complete idiot and this is all my fault really? No worries if not!Shockingly for someone who has just given herself the nickname The Organiser, I’m pretty neurotic when it comes to paying people back when I owe them money.
I tell myself I’ll do it straight away so I don’t forget, but the truth is I would NEVER forget. I wouldn’t be able to sleep if I didn’t.Maybe I’m jealous of those with a laissez-faire attitude to reimbursement.
They’re either secure in the knowledge that no-one’s going to sever ties over £14, extremely relaxed and easy-going, or their minds are on higher things, and they’re not even thinking about it. They’ve forgotten! Can you imagine? I genuinely can’t.Perhaps the solution to this is to step down; accept defeat, and in future play to my strengths instead of weaknesses.
Adjust your records accordingly please. I henceforth rebrand, from The Organiser to The Fastest Payer In The West..
